It's my dad's birthday today and although it would be a perfect opportunity to post something nice, I decided to look back at these years without him and try to imagine what he would have thought about my achievements.
I know I don't owe anyone anything and I should create my own world, but he was so proud of me getting a degree and becoming a teacher and when I was about to start that journey, he suddenly passed away. So, what's the situation today? Is there anything he would still be proud of?
My weakness is the combination of my dedication to work and my sense of justice. I'm aware the rules change as soon as you leave college and start working in a system you aren't really prepared for, but so much injustice hurts me to the point that I've become worried about my health.
No matter how proud my dad was of my success, there's something that keeps resonating with me - his words "I'm just afraid you'll go crazy working in a school". It's been 17 years since he died, but I keep witnessing and experiencing so many things that could eventually lead to his premonition, such as disrespect, mobbing, sexual harassment, local politics, corruption, hurtful blind ambition... At this point we should be happy that the kids are mostly OK while the adults are fighting bizarre endless wars, but it hurts me to see how the focus has shifted from our students' problems to our petty disagreements.
And to all those saying that teacher's work is easy because of oh sooo much free time, just shut up and try walking a week in my shoes. So much unnecessary pressure, unpaid overtime hours and made-up obligations to feed someone else's ego - believe me, it's the same everywhere you work, no matter if it's for the government or in a private sector. Our educational system is no exception.
So, dad, happy birthday, although it's not the birthday card you'd expect or deserve. And you don't have to be proud of my occupation, I just hope you're proud of the person I've become.
Nema komentara:
Objavi komentar